It's almost 10 p.m. on Thanksgiving Day. I must confess that I should be asleep. At 6:30, my eyes wouldn't stay open. I was stuffed. Turkey, dressing, corn casserole, green beans, lots and lots of rolls, and two helpings of peach crisp/cobbler (made with Splenda, of course). It was lights out.
Why then, nearly four hours later, am I wide awake? It just doesn't make sense! Watched a little college hoops, a little college football, after watching two NFL games earlier. It's a good day. Time for bed. After all, that 4 a.m. work shift of following around the crazies on Black Friday is going to come early! Yet, there's no blissful sleep here. Nope, just some blissful tunes as sung by Lady Antebellum.
So, I've decided to do a little soul writing. I love writing. I really do. If you check this blog often, it may not seem like it. But I write for a living. And I've discovered Twitter, which has become an all-consuming obsession of mine. Lots of writing ... in little spurts at a time. But it's not often that I do much soul writing. Have never been that great at journaling my thoughts and passions. And I've failed miserably at keeping this blog updated, mostly because I would prefer to keep my innermost thoughts inward.
However, I wanted to write tonight about what everyone writes about today -- the obligatory reasons why I'm thankful in my life.
It's no secret for people who know me that this past year hasn't exactly been easy. It's never easy losing a job, much less two of them. It's never easy living nearly seven hours away from the person you love the most on this earth for nearly six months. This year was perhaps the most difficult and trying one of my life. Yet, I have so many reasons to be thankful.
At this time last year, I had no clue what was right around the corner. It was only about two weeks later that I was laid off from my job at The Town Talk. It was a good thing that Elizabeth and I decided to have an early Christmas, or we wouldn't have had one. In fact, I spent Christmas seven hours away from my wife, miserable. I spent many miserable days and nights away from my wife and new puppy in New Braunfels, Texas -- miserable because we weren't together, yet hopeful for what our future would bring. I had a new job, and it looked like we were going to be starting a new chapter in our lives, in a new home, with a fresh start.
Unfortunately, things would only get worse before they got better. About six months after I moved to Texas, Elizabeth was finally able to join me, quitting her job at the paper that laid me off and embarking her way into Texas with a new job at the paper I was working at. Only that lasted just two weeks before we both lost our jobs, thanks to an insane publisher and my big mouth for having the gall to stand up for what was right instead of being a yes-man.
So, instead of being unemployed while my wife worked, we were both unemployed, at my own hand -- you want to talk about the worst feeling ever? How about talking your wife into quitting her job, and then being the reason she's fired at her new one? I think I reached a new low, a new brokenness, that fortunately helped bring us closer together than we've ever been. Adversity is a very funny thing. It can bring you closer together or push you farther apart. Elizabeth and I have seen our fair share of adversity, and thankfully we usually come out better off on the other end.
I say all of this just to lead up to the part of thankfulness. In June, I was about as long as I could get. I was never suicidal, but I certainly was depressed. I couldn't understand how I could have allowed myself to get into that position, and I hated myself for causing so much pain for my wife. All I've ever wanted was to be able to take care of her, and there I sat, unemployed for the second time in seven months with seemingly no options in sight.
It was a tough 2 months as I struggled to find out what the next step was. Did we stay in Alexandria? Did we look to move again? How do you know what's the right thing to do? Even when you think you're listening for God's voice, is it really His, or just what you want to hear?
Now to the thankful part -- we're better off right now that we were at this point last year. Elizabeth was able to land a great job at a credit union, and she's already been promoted. She's blown them away, and we've gotten over the initial disappointment that she wasn't able to get her job back at the paper. She has responsibility, is able to use her degree and has some great hours.
Meanwhile, I'm back where I was a year ago, even if in a different role. I'm back at the paper in Alexandria, working in city government, rather than in sports. But while sports is my passion, my current job definitely has its own positives. Much better hours. A regular schedule, rather than the "Vampire" one we lived for the previous two years. And I don't have nearly as much responsibility. Instead of being an editor at the bottom of the totem pole, I'm a writer whose responsibility is simply to do his job and not worry about the other stuff. I'm very thankful, not only to have a job after losing two other ones, but to have a job that I'm pretty good at and really enjoy, even if it has its frustrating moments.
I'm thankful that my wife and I are back together, and we have a great puppy that we love very much. That Christmas last year that we had early, well, I got a beagle mix puppy named Sandy who is now 15 months old and one of the sweetest things ever. And Elizabeth still gets to use the new stove that I bought her for Christmas, when we both thought she would lose that when we sold our house. I love my family. I'm thankful for my wife. I'm thankful that I get to come home to her, even if it's late at night because I'm off officiating a basketball game, or I have to cover a late city council meeting. I'm thankful that she's here when I get home and that she loves me.
I'm thankful for my parents, who I still do not see nearly enough or call enough on the phone. I'm thankful that they care about me, they care enough to overlook my obvious faults as a son and continue to love me unconditionally. I'm thankful for my in-laws, who are always there for me, whether it's to provide a meal, just to hang out and watch football or bull riding, to puppy-sit, or to help with one of the minor or major projects around the house. I'm thanking for my brother and my brothers-in-law and their families, my nephews and nieces, who may have more energy than I can sustain, but who also make me smile with wonder at how quickly life changes.
I'm thankful for my friends, who I get to see more often now that Elizabeth and I have normal work schedules and no longer are vampires. Whether it's a spontaneous trip up for pizza, or a planned weekend, I'm grateful that I have tremendous friends who love and care for me. I'm grateful that I can pick up a phone, place a call or send a text, and know that whether it's a joke or a serious question, they're there for me. I've never needed hundreds of friends to make me happy, but I've always held my few friends close to my heart. I hope you guys know that I'm always here, and I'm glad you're always there for me.
There's so much more that I'm thankful for that I cannot even begin to mention everything. But to sum things up, I'm thankful for today and hopeful for tomorrow. None of us know what it will bring, but after a year of struggles, I'm more hopeful today than I've ever been. I've seen things begin to turn around, and I truly believe there are only better things coming in the future.
Happy Thanksgiving Day! I have a lot to be thankful for!
